“So now what?” is the refrain that I keep asking myself and that others are asking of me. For over a year I have been on a journey of transition from a “well put together life” to this walk of faith, which, by it’s very nature, implies that I don’t know all the twists and turns that lie ahead. The Bible says, Man may make his plans but God directs his steps. Proverbs 16:9. So many times we think a straight line is the shortest distances between two points, but in our best interest, many times God will take us the long way round because in his unconditional love for us, He knows that we aren’t as ready as we think we are for the endpoint. He is so good and so patient with us to work with us in all our faults and shortcomings, bringing us strength in our weakness, joy in our sadness, and hope when our days seem darkest. I had a plan: 1) go to France to learn French, 2) go to Mozambique to complete Missions School, 3) go to Madagascar to visit, 4) come home to wrap things up, 5) move to Madagascar for two years. That was my well thought out, carefully considered, best intentioned plan. Well, I completed steps 1-3 but then God brought me home with other purposes in mind. I still believe and know that it is my destiny to serve in Madagascar. That hasn’t and won’t change. But the path by which I will get there is now a little more curved. I felt so clearly in my heart the drawing to Madagascar, a country I had never really considered before. But I haven’t felt that same pull towards any one organization. And so, I am in a holding pattern, like a plane that circles in the sky until it’s safe to land. In the mean time, I am taking the time to rest, read, pray and learn a slower pace. Since I was 16 I have worked and labored, advanced and achieved. For a while during my time at university, I had three jobs. Then, in my early years in Houston, I would moonlight on the weekends with a second job at my apartment complex. Over the years, I have hosted nearly every wedding shower, baby shower, and birthday party; my house was the hang out spot, constantly filled with hungry and thirsty friends. I was ambitious and strived to reach higher and higher goals in my career, spending more and more hours at work. And I loved every minute of it all. But now is my time to rest. And I mean really rest- on the inside. I am putting to bed every question of who I am, what I believe, what is my value and where does that worth come from. I am settling old scores with my past, silencing every voice of guilt or regret. I am building strength in my soul, my character, my calling, and strength in my convictions. It’s in the quiet, when the soul chatters the most, that the challenge arises to meet every thought, question, picture and memory with the truth of what God has said. Not what I have felt, or what I have perceived, nor what I have imagined. But with the immovable, never changing, every steady truth of God. Truth doesn’t change, but I must let it change me. Truth doesn’t move, but I must let it move me. Truth isn’t relative, but I must let it relate to every part of my being, thereby changing the way I see, feel, and think about everything. So the answer to the question “So now what?” is simple: wait and rest until He moves me again.